Good-bye Abigail

Abigail Keeler.
1993-2006.
Beloved friend and shoulder-rider, who has forever left her paw-prints on my heart.

The Rainbow Bridge

Slap Your Co-Worker Day is Coming!!

This is one of the funniest e-mails I have received in ages so I couldn't resist sharing it here. I figure it was created by the people who work with Adam Weissman who, according to "Music Hath Charms" in a recent issue of USA Today, inflicts his music on his coworkers by playing his iPod through his computer speakers instead of using a headset. Can you imagine having a really bad day, then having this guy inflict his choice of music on you? The article says he likes to cheer up his coworkers with songs like "The Muppet Show" theme. Yes sir, one incident like this would lead to a severe slapping!

Slap Your Co-Worker Day is Coming!!

Tomorrow is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday. Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't give a damn about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it? Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very, very glad to officially announce tomorrow as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! There are the rules you must follow:

• You can only slap one person per hour - no more.
• You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day.
• You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-workers take their turns slapping the irritant.
• No weapons are allowed ... other than going upside somebody's head with a stapler or a hole-puncher.
• CURSING IS MANDATORY! After you have slapped the recipient, your "assault" must be followed with something like "cause I'm sick of your stupid-a$$ always messing up stuff!"
• If questioned by a supervisor or police (if the supervisor is the irritant), you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE!

Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that you want to slap the living daylights out of and get to slapping ... and have a GREAT DAY!

Thank God I don't work with anyone who deserves slapping!

A Night to Remember

April 14, 1912. At 11:40 p.m., despite the efforts of First Officer William Murdock, Titanic struck an iceberg and damaged six of her watertight compartments. It took her 2 hours and 40 minutes to sink. In that time 1/3 of those on board escaped in lifeboats. Titanic had more than the required number of boats, enough for about half those on board, but most boats were launched with less than full capacity (for many reasons).

The other 2/3 of Titanic's passengers and crew, over 1,500 men, women, and children, died horribly and needlessly. Many faced death bravely and their stories are part of what keep the memory of Titanic alive today. Titanic died with them, after only four days of service.

Then she, the stricken hull,
The doomed, the beautiful,
Proudly to Fate abased
Her bow titanic.
Praise now her multitude,
Who, nursed her fortitude,
Fell in on deck and faced
Death without panic.

From Poems and Ballads (1896)
by Sir Arthur Quiller-Couch

In 1898 Senator William Alden Smith, who led the American Inquiry of the Titanic disaster, cut this poem out of a newspaper. In late 1913 Smith re-read the poem and was struck by its eerie resemblance to Titanic. Notice that it was written 16 years before the disaster.

The Winner: Dan Brown

I just heard that last Friday "High Court Judge Peter Smith threw out a copyright-infringement claim by Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh, who said Brown's blockbuster plagiarized their 1982 book, Holy Blood, Holy Grail." Read the story on CNN; includes a link to the actual verdict.

Funny, the lawsuit got more news coverage than the verdict. If I were cynical, I'd say that the media only covers surprising/unexpected stories...

94 Years Ago Today

April 10, 1912. RMS Titanic left Southampton, England for her maiden voyage to New York City. While leaving Southamptom her massive bulk snapped the lines of ships moored nearby, including the American Line's New York. A collision was avoided at the last minute, but Titanic was delayed for about an hour. She then crossed the Channel to Cherborg, France and arrived about 7 p.m. The cross-Channel passenger disembarked and after taking on passengers and mail Titanic headed for Queenstown, Ireland.

Warriors of Oz?!

Today's paper, in the coupons, contained an ad for Warriors of Oz by Hamilton Authenticated. Authenticated what? This has nothing to do with the book/movie we all know and love. Dorothy as Zena, Warrior Princess? Toto as a demon dog? Scarecrow the archer, Tinman the Cylon, and Lion the were-lion. What the hell was Hamilton Authenticated thinking and who buys this crap?

Hear that rumbling sound? It's L. Frank Baum spinning in his grave.

Time to Car Hunt?

My 1991 Toyota Camry has an elusive electrical problem. My first clue was when the horn and idiot alarm (the thing that beeps when you leave your keys in the ignition or leave the lights on) quit working. Not having a horn bothered me so I asked both my mechanic and the Toyota dealer what to do about this problem. Both told me it would be expensive to diagnose and repair because it requires essentially dismantling the car. Both told me it wasn't worth it for a 15-year-old car with 200,000+ miles on it.

I really like this car. It's in good shape for its age and still gets good gas mileage. I decided to put up with the elusive electrical problem. Before long the dome light quit, but I didn't really think about it. It could just be the bulb, after all. Then the dashboard lights for the heat/AC quit. They still come back on sometimes, when I hit a bump.

This week the elusive electrical problem added some new, weird manifestations. First, I noticed the "door ajar" light on the dashboard was flickering. It didn't go away even after I slammed all the doors. Then I pulled into McDonald's and, to my horror, realized the windows no longer work. The only time I really need to put them down is in a drive-through -- or when it's warm and rainy and the windows fog over (for which the defrost is totally useless), and that's pretty much all summer. That's when I got scared. If the windows don't work, could the same thing happen to the electric locks? I never lock the doors when I'm in the car now for fear of getting trapped inside. (I'm claustrophobic and just thinking about that makes me uneasy.)

SIGH. I guess it's time to start looking for a newer car. I dread it. I know nothing about cars. My brother tells me to buy a new Saturn using his GM Option 1 because I drive too much to lease. My father-in-law tells me I'm crazy to buy because leasing is cheaper, even if you put a lot of miles on the car. Leasing a car that's a couple of years old is even better. Do I want a Saturn or another Camry? New or used? Can I even afford a new/newer car? Is my old Camry worth any trade-in value? How low can I get the payments? Do I need a down payment? I'm so busy with grading right now that thinking about these about these things, let alone the idea of looking at new or used cars, puts my stress level through the roof.

Maybe I'll just buy a lottery ticket.

94 Years Ago Today

April 2, 1912. RMS Titanic underwent her sea trial and passed with flying colors. Her keel was laid down March 31, 1909 and she was launched May 31, 1911. It took over two years to build her, almost a year to fit her out (complete the insides), one day to test her at sea, and 2 hours and 40 minutes to sink her just five days into her maiden voyage.

Every year from March 30, when Capt. Smith transferred from her sister Olympic, to April 15 I think about where she was each day, and what was happening to Titanic. If only I could change history!

To Be, Or Not To Be: Four Hundred Years of Vanitas Painting

Yesterday my husband and I went to the Flint Institute of Arts to see an exhibit called "To Be, Or Not To Be: Four Hundred Years of Vanitas Painting." You can read Roger's detailed post on his blog. I won't repeat his post by explaining what vanitas is or describing the exhibit, but I will admit that I had a hard time not laughing at the one piece of abstract modern art in the exhibit.

I enjoyed the exhibit. The painting are fascinating and disturbing reminders to enjoy life because it is so short. We couldn't resist buying the catalog because it was only $25. I highly recommend this exhibit but, unfortunately, today is the last day.

The Da Vinci Crock

Lewis Purdue, author of Daughter of God and The Da Vinci Legacy, left a comment regarding my post Plagiarism or Greed? on the recent lawsuits against Dan Brown. He said:

Greed?

If you examine the facts at http://davincicrock.blogspot.com, you will find that I am donating proceeds from the suit to charity.

And that Random House sued ME, not the other way around.

And the legal fight is not over. Next hearing in NYC on April 11

Lewis, thank you for visiting my blog and setting me straight about your problems with Random House. The media sure didn't report your story accurately. (How typical!)

As promised I'm putting this in a new post with the link to your Da Vinci Crock so my readers (few though they may be) will get the whole story.

I've also put your books on my list of books to read and recommend we all read them in the interest of fairness.

I'm sure I won't be the only one waiting to see how your case turns out. Good luck, Lewis!

Oh no! Sudoku!

It finally happened. Like so many other people I have become hooked on the latest puzzle craze: Sudoku. It's my sister-in-law's fault for letting me try her handheld electronic Sudoku. It's much easier than playing the paper-and-pencil version, and I can actually finish puzzles (easy ones, anyway).

For those who don't know, Sudoku looks like a crossword puzzle but uses numbers. I didn't think I'd like it because I'm terrible at crosswords and Scrabble. (Yes, I know it's ironic. *sigh*) Unlike crosswords, Sudoku uses logic rather than knowledge of obscure words even English majors have never heard of; maybe that's why I like it. It reminds me of cryptograms, which I love.

I love it so much I bought my own LCD Ultimate Sudoku handheld game at Wal-Mart. It's somewhat clunky compared to the kind that comes with a stylus (which you can buy at Target or Kay Bee Toys) but I like it because you can get hints if you want, make uncertain answers flash until you figure them out, choose from three levels of play, and even input puzzles from other sources. There's a built-in timer, too. All this for $13! The only thing I don't like is that you can't turn the sound off. I kind of like the sound but it would be inconvenient for travel (unless you want to annoy other people).

If you want to try Sudoku I recommend Web Sudoku. It includes instructions and you can play on-line or print the puzzles. This site has millions of puzzles with four difficulty levels (easy, medium, hard, and evil) and shareware to download so you can play Sudoku on your own computer (PC or Mac) anytime. If you play on-line you can get hints, just like the handheld version. (I like hints!)

The Daily Sudoku is also good but the site is undergoing maintenance just now. You can't play on-line but there is a printable archive with puzzles of all levels of difficulty. The site includes instructions, four types of puzzles (Classic, Monster, Kids, and Squiggly), and the option of choosing the size of the printed puzzle. The kids' section has puzzles that are good for kids or adult beginners and you have the option of choosing numbers or letters.

I recommend this game, especially the electronic form, for anyone who enjoys puzzles or wants to improve their logic/critical thinking. Using my LCD Ultimate Sudoku handheld game my time has improved from about 30 minutes to about 10 minutes for an easy puzzle. I'm enjoying it so much I might even try an intermediate puzzle sometime.

Treasures of Ancient Egypt: The Quest for Immortality

If you are looking for something cool to do on the west side of the state, visit the Treasures of Ancient Egypt: The Quest for Immortality exhibit at the Public Museum of Grand Rapids. This is one of the best Egyptian exhibits I've ever seen and "the exhibition contains the largest and most comprehensive selection of antiquities ever loaned by Egypt, many never seen outside the country." Yes, you would have to visit the museum in Cairo to see this stuff.

Highlights

• Statue of Osirus rising
• Statue of Osirus as King of the dead
• 8-foot head of Ramses II
• 2 gold mummy masks
• 1 nearly intact beaded mummy net
• Recreation of Tuthmose III's burial chamber
• Exquisite, delicate jewelry of a princess
  

There's lots more: shabtis, coffins, god statues (of all sizes), even a boat! This exhibit is worth the drive to Grand Rapids and the $17 entry fee. If you are not familiar with Egyptology you might also want to spring $6 for the self-guided audio tour. Hurry! The exhibit ends May 7.

Plagiarism or Greed?

Dan Brown, author of The Da Vinci Code, is being sued for plagiarism. According to Lawyer: Dan Brown evidence suspect, published yesterday on CNN:

Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh are suing Da Vinci Code publisher Random House, claiming Brown's book "appropriated the architecture" of their 1982 nonfiction book, The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail. Both books explore theories -- dismissed by theologians -- that Jesus married Mary Magdalene, the couple had a child and the bloodline survives.

Brown indirectly acknowledged Leigh and Baigent by naming a character, Sir Leigh Teabing (an anagram of Baigent) after them, but they want more. Their lawsuit could even delay release of the new film of The Da Vinci Code.

According to 'Da Vinci Code' case nears ending, published Sunday on CNN, this not the first time Brown has been sued over The Da Vinci Code, "Last August he won a court ruling against Lewis Perdue, who alleged The Da Vinci Code copied elements of two of his novels, Daughter of God and The Da Vinci Legacy."

What do these cases have in common? Greed, I'm sure. The Da Vinci Code has been on The New York Times best-seller list for two years and has sold over 40 million copies. 40 million! Just imagine that. Even if Dan Brown makes less than a dollar in royalties per book, he has made millions. I'm sure Leigh and Baigent, like Perdue before them, are motivated by the idea of getting part of that money.

I hope they don't. I'm ticked because of their greed and because their lawyer is now trying to drag Brown's wife, who helped with the research, into the case. If Leigh and Baigent win, does it mean authors can't use non-fiction or history in fictional works? I supposed we can thank James Frey, author of A Million Little Pieces, for muddying the distinction between fiction and non-fiction, but Brown acknowledged that fact that he's read lots of books on his subject and none of the ideas are really new. He's right. What's new is the creative and compelling story he created that is driving people to learn more about art, history, and religion -- and I hope he's not punished for that.

Would Jesus Use an Apostrophe?

The other day I passed church sign that said:

Are you ready for Jesus return?

I don't think the sign had the intended affect result.* All I could think if was WPWJU (What punctuation would Jesus use)?

I wish people would learn how to use apostrophes!


* This is for you, Mermaldad! Everyone else can read the comments to see why.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Two Irish men were shipwrecked. After some time in the water they manage to crawl up on an iceberg.

"Are we safe now?" asked Patty.

"Of course," said Mike. "Look, here comes Titanic!"

Eat or Sleep? Now you can do both at the same time!

According to "Study Links Ambien Use To Unconscious Food Forays" by Stephanie Saul published in The New York Times Tuesday Late Edition - Final on March 14, 2006, page 1:

The sleeping pill Ambien seems to unlock a primitive desire to eat in some patients, according to emerging medical case studies that describe how the drug's users sometimes sleepwalk into their kitchens, claw through their refrigerators like animals and consume calories ranging into the thousands.

The next morning, the night eaters remember nothing about their foraging. But they wake up to find telltale clues: mouthfuls of peanut butter, Tostitos in their beds, kitchen counters overflowing with flour, missing food, and even lighted ovens and stoves. Some are so embarrassed, they delay telling anyone, even as they gain weight.

One patient "did not link Ambien to her nocturnal eating until after she gained 100 pounds," even after her family told her about her sleep eating. Why on earth not? Where did she think the weight was coming from? Did she just wake up every morning and say, "Wow, honey, I slept really well, but I seem to have gained a bit of weight -- hey! where's all our food? Oh, well, time to hit the grocery store."

If you don't have electronic access to the NY Times, you read a simliar story on Fox News today: Ambien linked to "Sleep Eating."

The Curse Continues

I wrote too soon about things being back to normal, technologically. Today my iRiver portable CD player died. It was only two years old and I loved it for several reasons:

• It was so slim and portable -- with skip protection, too!
• It had a car adaptor, so I never had to listen to the radio.
• It played mp3 format. I could convert my audio books to mp3 and fit a book on one disk. That meant listening to a whole book without the inconvenience of switching disks while driving.
• It had easy-to-use switches (off, on, pause, reverse, etc.) that I could use without taking my eyes from the road.
  

Now it's dead and the company no longer makes portable CD players; they have been replaced with iPod-type mp3 players.

I love my iPod but I don't want to use it in the car, not even with a car adaptor and dashboard iPod holder. To do so would mean taking my eyes off the road. *Sigh.*

Fortunately, iRiver has a web site and an 800 number for customer service. They helped me find an older version of my beloved CD player in their clearance section. The price was so low they were practically giving it away. UPS tracking says it will arrive Friday, just in time for my trip to Kalamazoo Saturday, so I am saved from the boredom of radio and the danger of using an iPod in the car ... for now.

Oh, the (Technological) Irony

After my post the other day on Amazing Technology two things happened to shake my faith in my current technology.

First, on Friday I couldn't get on the Internet. Everything was hooked up correctly all the modem and router lights were happy, etc. First I called my Internet provider, then I called the company that made my router, both walked me through a bunch of troubleshooting steps, said it wasn't their product, and blamed the other. (Of course!) I spent the morning at the library using the free Wi-Fi only to discover that the problem had mysterious corrected itself by the time I got home. My IT buddy Dan called it a "server hiccup" -- there was nothing technically wrong, just a temporary loss of connection to my service provider. How annoying! I hope that doesn't happen often.

Second, on Sunday my Airport Express (which allows us to use our laptops wirelessly) died. I mean dead, and it's only two months old. Fortunately, Apple has outstanding customer service. They immediately shipped a replacement which arrived the next day! I was less pleased with CompUSA who would not exchange it, even though it was under warranty, because we didn't purchase their CompUSA customer service along with the Airport Express. I believe customer service should come with a purchase, not be something I pay extra for. Needless to say, I will never purchase anything from CompUSA again!

So things are back to normal and, technologically, life is good.

I love technology ... when it works.

That Explains Everything!

I found this in an ad on WebMD:

"Being active and over 40 can be a pain. Boomeritis."

That explains everything!

Amazing Technology

Technology amazes me. My first computer didn't have a hard drive. It took up the entire desk and weighed a ton (and it was small compared to its contemporaries).

My first hard drive was external and held 20 or 30 MB. I never imagined filling up all that space. Compared to our currently technology this is laughable, especially when you look at the size of the case. Talk about big and clunky!

My laptop PowerBook G4 weighs less than 5 pounds and does everything a desktop computer can, plus it's wireless. It holds 2,000 times as much data as my first hard drive.

My Lexar Jump Drive Pro holds a gigabyte. It's the size of my thumb and holds 50 times more data than my first hard drive!

My 4GB iPod Nano holds over 200 times more data than my first hard drive!

I use my laptop, jump drive, and iPod daily and I am still amazed. If computer technology has advanced this much in the last 20 years, what does the future hold? I can hardly wait to see. Maybe I will live to see Star Trek type computers. Scotty, beam me up!

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Math and computer geeks can skip this section; it is for the mathematically impaired (like me). I had to ask two different people to calculate the comparison of my first hard drive to my current technology. LOL.

How the heck are gigs (GB), megs (MB), etc. measured? Here's a quick reference from greatest to least:

Gigabyte = 1 billion bytes, or 1024 MB.
Most hard drives are now measured in GBs.

Megabyte = 1 million bytes, or 1024 KB
According to Wikipedia, a megabyte of data can roughly hold:
* one larger book (excluding images)
* one "typical" sized photograph with reasonably good quality
* a hundred small images
* roughly a minute of compressed music

For comparison: A CD holds 700 MB of data or 80 min. of uncompressed music

Kilobyte = 1024 bytes
This is how much a 3" floppy disk holds.

Byte = 8 bits. Standard unit of measure for computer storage space.

Bit = binary digits

Binary digits (or binary code) are the magic combination ones and zeros that make your computer work.